#NotAFan But I Really Want To Be.

Opinions Are Not Safe Spaces.

I am not a fan of Beyoncé or Jay-Z.

There. I said it. Out in the rest of the world.

I am saying this out in the rest of the world that has become obsessed with them as individuals, become obsessed with their children, her pregnancies, more obsessed with these two personalities than they are with living their own lives in general. In a world that has become obsessed with only spending time with and interacting with those who only ‘like’ what they like. In a world that has become obsessed with ‘safe spaces’ and a lack of intellectual discourse on why we might individually disagree on why coffee ice cream is the best and agree to disagree having heard each other out.

Sure, I like some of his beats and whoever she has chosen to do the styling and choreography for her videos have powers on the creative scale that are pretty amazing (Pharrell is wondrous), but I am not a fan. I don’t know Beyoncé Knowles-Carter or Shawn Carter. Not personally. So what I am not a fan of are their public personas; Of what they are putting out into the world that will stand as their legacy. This is something every artist has the opportunity to choose and painstakingly craft for ourselves. Our brand. Our public persona. Don’t we? Most of us don’t have a team of 20 to help us do it though.

Voldemort.

I remember a while ago, I said I wasn’t a fan of Beyoncé’s public persona at an art show during a conversation, before I became a little more leary of how obsessed others become with the lives of others. After I said, it there was a sharp intake of air from the guy I was talking to. He choked and sputtered a little bit, gave me a very suspicious once over. His response was not unlike someone overhearing some foolish character in Harry Potter saying ‘Voldemort’. Isn’t an art show of all places a space where we can discuss what we aren’t quite in alignment with and why? Isn’t this where discussions with obnoxiously, pompously smart people happen? Oh… Ok. No? I was obviously mistaken. Pardon my ignorance. Keep my real opinions to myself. Right.

We didn’t talk again after that. Not being a part of the Beyhive to him meant we were incompatible, even as just friends. Call me crazy but I think that’s weird. Since when don’t I have the room in any relationship to not like exactly what you do? Is this who we’ve become as a country. Just joking. That’s obviously rhetorical. Look what’s going on with us politically.

#Sad | #Genius

For the first time, recently, I saw all of the “Apeshit” video. (Sure I’m a little late on this but does it matter?) Heard all of the lyrics. I came to understand that fame is a disease. It is really a monster. I don’t know who said it first but Gaga made it famous: Fame is a monster. It’s dirty. It changes things. The lyrics writhe and revel in the idea of fame and public validation:

“I said no to the Super Bowl: you need me, I don't need you
Every night we in the end zone, tell the NFL we in stadiums too
Last night was a fuckin' zoo
Stagedivin' in a pool of people
Ran through Liverpool like a fuckin' Beatle
Smoke gorilla glue like it's fuckin' legal
Tell the Grammy's fuck that 0 for 8 shit
Have you ever seen a crowd goin' apeshit? “

Have I ever? Umm…well, first I don’t every really refer to anyone really in terms that compare them to animals. It insults animals and people at some point and then you know the history of brown people being referred to as apes and such? Right? Have I ever seen a crowd going ‘crazy’? Sure. For me? No. That group of people is relatively small. Most of us have no experience with playing stadiums. Of course you don’t need the NFL, but you do know what they use those stadiums for right?

If this is all for the sake of being ‘ironic’ or if this is a caricature or parody of a self-centered, self-contained universe and I didn’t get it, well, what can I say? But if it isn’t…

My only question would be if this was all anyone ever heard about you, heard from you, experienced of you…Would you be satisfied? Is this what you’d want others to know and remember?

I loved the video (I am honestly a fan of most of Beyoncé’s videos). Love. What’s genius: juxtaposing yourself (as artist) with some of the most famous and recognizable pieces of art (even for those who don’t study art). Genius: being posed as royalty in a world where the worth of brown skin seems to have taken a sharp nose dive (prison industrial complex anyone?). Genius: cinematography, choreography, styling. Genius: having dance leotards correspond to the color of each dancers’ skin. Therefore giving it value and importance. Genius: using an institution ( the Louvre) that houses some of the most famous works of art in the world, where most of said works of art have those of us whose skin is on the darker side of brown, usually just depicted as slaves or servants and rarely in positions of power. Baby? Haven’t we arrived? Insert The Jeffersons (or something more recent and relevant) theme song here.

It takes bravery, even when you’re already loved and accepted as a certain type of artist to do something conceptual and different. To play the long game and go a little deeper. Like any other artist, it’s taking a chance that some will get what you are attempting to convey and others won’t.

What’s sad for me though: the lyrics; for both of them. Their work together and separately. That’s it. Nothing else I really don’t like. But isn’t that all? Aren’t lyrics everything? Or at least a huge part of the music experience? A great beat has its place, but I digress…I believe in everyone’s right to express themselves and not give a sanitized version just for the sake of public consumption. We are multifaceted beings. But. You have to take a bath a some point don’t you? Clean your house at some point, right? Face the sun at some point. Or don’t I guess…But I say show your smart self. Use the vocabulary that some don’t believe brown people possess. Evolve. Do more. Be more. Be something other than a stereotype. Being something other than a stereotype does not mean becoming something that is simply easily digestible and that doesn’t shake people.

Here is a word puzzle/analogy/SAT word association: Painting is to hanging on someone’s wall behind their coordinated sofa as Popular Music is to elevator music.

What artist strives to simply hang on the wall in someone’s kitchen (I guess it might depend on who’s kitchen to some) or be Muzak? Not many. It depends on what your goals are. Most artists want to be relevant. Not just part of a conversation but the entire conversation or those who change the conversation. When I think about music I think of playing it in my car and the people next to me hearing it, am I proud of what I am playing at eardrum bursting decibels? I think of young impressionable children being influenced by it. Are they encouraged to change the world, be creative, love…or “go apeshit"? It is the same way I feel about the art I create. I want to meet people where they are and take them on a journey. When people ask me to explain my work and speak about it intelligently I need to be able to do so without putting up walls that others can’t see around or get over don’t I?

A pet peeve of mine with other artists though is feeling that you have to put negativity into the world in order to add gravity to its meaning. In order for people to understand that darkness exists you don’t have to use the vocabulary of darkness or inject it into everything. For people to pay attention. Not only the dark side is meaningful. The balance is the meaning. Negative is already there. It always is. Without me or anyone else creating more of it.

The words! It’s about the words! You can’t change history. Even something as powerful as art can’t change it. You can paint it differently. That’s all. It is just a fact. Just like you can’t erase slavery or turn it into something positive, you can’t take n**** and turn it into a ‘positive’ word. It’s not my word. It’s not your word. It is hate manifest as a word. For me it affects the way I absorb anything.

Be More Than The Brand.

What I am a fan of as far as Beyoncé being and entity unto herself, Jay-Z, and The Carters as a partnership is the business sense. The branding. The polish. The vision. Magnificent.

My challenge to them and any artist honestly is to forget about the hubris, fame and all of its trappings. Do your work. Do good work. Be more than the brand. Be deeper. Be more than the polish. Understand the legacy. Be more than the words. Convey meaning. Be more than just Hip-Hop royalty, the manifestation of a bygone era that benefits from hierarchy, caste, women bumping and grinding/staying in their place, and stepping on the neck of someone else to validate a sense of self-importance. Be regal and be artists with a conscience and a true understanding of how what they make affects the world around them.

The Artistic Perils of Constant Agreement

Please like me. 

In the world as it exists at this moment, there a millions of us that determine our self-worth by how many 'likes' our last post received, how many 'friends' or 'followers' we have or how many people click 'favorite' for something we've done or said. Honestly, who doesn't want to have the warm glow of a spotlight shined on them from time to time? This should be o.k. , shouldn't it? 

The sad reality is that we love those that are saying what we want (or think we want) to hear and completely cut out of our lives those that push us to think a little more about what we believe. In the end, not only do we miss out on the much needed pro/con balance that we all should have to make well-informed decisions, but we also miss out on the mental and emotional exercise of thinking progressively.

But what about when we as artists allow what has become our need to be liked to temper the work we do as well as our personal opinions and preferences when it comes to addressing certain subject matter? A little disagreement and discourse are what make the world go round, right? Of course, not to the point that it becomes destructive (Also known as filibustering. But that is, ahem...a whole other topic entirely.), but there is nothing wrong with disagreement. The world of art is built on the act of disagreeing.

A World Built on Disagreements.

Have I totally lost you?

Well, just think about it. I am going to scare myself now by actually remembering things that I learned in school: If you've taken any 20th century art classes, do you remember the day that your professor talked about the Impressionists? What about Pointillism? These artists had a decidedly different way of looking at the world that most traditional artists and art aficionado didn't agree with in their time. Most people thought they were crazy (well in the case of Van Gogh he was a smidgen kooky, but I digress...) What about Dada? People really thought those artists had lost it because they'd wandered so far from the path of the traditional. Of course now we all have the benefit of 20/20 vision. We can at least respect their way of looking at the world and the act of art-making if not their genius. More than likely, if these artists had been on Facebook, Pinterest, or Twitter their artistic self-esteem would have been in the toilet. No pins. No likes. And definitely no followers. What would we have missed out on if these artists hadn't had the courage to stand by their decision to disagree? You got it. Probably no Impressionists. Then what would we have put up on our dorm room walls in college if not cheap poster reproductions of "The Scream" and "Water Lilies"?

It's Our Responsibility. 

It is one of the many responsibilities of artists to disagree. We have the opportunity to be reporters, truth tellers, messengers, therapists and psychologists. We see the world differently. It is meant for us to help others see things differently as well.  And a lot of the time people aren't going to be so happy with what we tell them. When we choose to RESPECTFULLY disagree, we expand someone's world a little by (hopefully) prompting and exchange of ideas. Because I truly hope that someone would ask me why I think the way that I do instead of stomping off in anger. That way we can chat. I can learn something and they can learn something.

Next time... 

So next time you click the 'like', 'favorite', 'pin', 'follow', 'friend' or whatever the button may be, think a little more about why you do it. Why not go ahead and click favorably even when we don't agree but appreciate and respect when someone has challenged us intellectually and made us think. Thinking is good.