Virus No. 1: The Conversation We Need To Have
More Than Six Feet Apart.
This is the first art related essay I’ve written since the complete reopening of Florida. Kinda sorta post pandemic, but not really post anything because at this moment I know someone who is in a hospital ICU struggling with Covid. Not so post pandemic after all. I’ve not felt as troubled about Covid-19 and the variants (though this is horrifically troubling) as I have been about who we’ve become as disgruntled, reluctant, and resistant hermits. During the height of the pandemic, between baking bread, sidewalk chalk drawings, and at home workouts we’ve had too much time to find new things to separate us. We’ve been creative in creating new hurdles for each of us to jump over to prove we are (and I cringe inwardly and outwardly as I write this) ‘woke’. I really hate that word now. Unfortunately for all our newfound ‘understanding’ and additional ‘respect’ of each other, we all seem to talk and truly connect less. I guess it’s because we all know each other so well? Probably not though.
The fear that I have now is of a world where learning how to use chopsticks, lighting incense, doing yoga, and learning how to wrap your head might be characterized at misappropriation where at one point it was seen as making an attempt to understand and experience another culture. I digress though. We need a drum circle and an exorcism to get through a full conversation on race and culture.
The Hardest Art Description I’ve Ever Had to Write…
This is by far one of the hardest work reflection/summaries I’ve ever had to write.
To say that racism is difficult to discuss is an understatement. I personally believe it is even more difficult to discuss among various minorities that may encounter racism. Unfortunately one aspect of racism that isn’t often discussed is the racism that some minorities inflict upon other minorities. I can only speak about my personal experiences but I can also say that most of these issues are universal.
When we address racism and other discrimination we often do it in pieces. We have to remember that those of European heritage/white people aren’t the only individuals that commit acts of harmful racism; even though those acts of racism have had long lasting effects and are pervasive, they aren’t unique in their nature.
We all believe harmful, racist, discriminatory untruths about each other. We have all ingested and digested this racism. But do we perpetuate the stereotypes, the hurt, and strain? Or do we, community to community, work together to find solutions and common ground?
A Different Kind of Tower of Babel.
My concern about how we interact as humans at the moment leaves us in either an echo chamber or an individual silo. Addressing these individual untruths as unique, independent, and seemingly separate issues (Asian and Jewish hate crimes, African Americans experiences with police brutality and the justice system, church and mosque shootings for example) will end up leaving us where we all started: segregated. We must address racism as the cancer it is: You don’t remove it one piece at a time, you cut it all out. If we don’t focus on what unifies all of these challenging issues none of us will truly be communicating. Finding solutions that could positively affect us all will become an impossibility.
The pandemic year has among its highlights some of the most horrible acts of racism.These acts among other things are what inspired Virus No. 1: The Conversation We Need To Have. This piece - a 3-dimensional wooden unicorn puzzle- addresses particularly painful racist encounters that I hadn’t discussed with many people concerning my time in San Francisco. Recently, I ended up in a conversation with two other women, also of minority backgrounds: Filipino-American (Lissette), Mexican-American (Eve) where I discussed these experiences. Until my conversation with these two women I didn’t realize how traumatic this time in my life had been.
Trauma From An Unexpected Place.
A number of years ago, pre-pandemic in San Francisco I spent most of my time looking for affordable housing (otherwise known as homeless) I went to many properties shown to me by people of many different backgrounds. I noticed that each time I was shown a property by someone of Chinese descent there was an attempt to convince me I either didn’t want the space or I was told that it had already been rented right after I was shown the apartment. Another experience involved my mother and I walking through Chinatown. My Mom was hot and a little dehydrated. We stopped in a restaurant to get her some water. We were ignored. We went into another place and no one would serve us. After we found my Mom water and shelter from the heat, I was troubled by a huge ‘what if’. What if my Mom had passed out? Who would’ve helped us in Chinatown, if anyone? Eve talked about how as a very light complexioned Mexican American she was often mistaken for white. Two things often happened to her, she said: white people spoke with her in a disparaging way about other minorities and she was often told by other Mexicans she wasn’t ‘Mexican (or dark) enough’. Lissette spoke to us about her strained relationship with her parents because of derogatory views they’d expressed about other people of color.
As humans we have such a long way to go in an effort to evolve to become better humans. The key is to at least begin the journey down that long road by talking to one another and having tough conversations. Racism to me is the first and most pervasive human virus and no one really seems to be working on a vaccine.
Sketchbook Sketchings
“Sketching is the breath of art: it is the most refreshing of all the more impulsive forms of creative self-expression and, as such, it should be as free, and happy…”
“Sometimes the very best of all summer books is a blank notebook. Get one big enough, and you can practice sketching the lemon slice in your drink or the hot lifeguard on the beach or the vista down the hill from your cabin.”
The Sketch Book Isn’t Always Full.
I can’t remember the last time I was really with out some type of sketch book. Even when I was 8 or so I had a steno pad I drew in. I didn’t keep anything, I just gave the drawings away. I also would put them in envelopes and decorate them; give them as gifts. I had (still have) a thing for receiving mail. Receiving mail is like a surprise gift, hopefully… (“What’s in the Box!?!?!” Forgive my movie reference. I couldn’t resist.)
Dont think I don’t ever use my phone for notes and such, I do. I have 600 pictures and 100 types of notes and lists. I am just the type of artist that also needs to touch things: a pen, the paper, smear things with my fingers, rip some paper… It can’t be replaced.
Books, Books Everywhere.
I keep books kind of everywhere these days. In my purse I always have a book. In my car I have a book for notes and thoughts since I listen to audiobooks and music all of the time. They are all a combination of thought/idea books or word sketches (since I can totally make up my own things here) with sketches for work or design layouts. I have a book specifically for my community work. That was a gift. I keep ideas, meeting notes and such in it. I make my own books too but also buy books. I just bought 2.
Playing Favorites.
My favorite of all is to sketch on tracing paper. I overlay and combine previous sketches plus I love the way the paper sounds…all crinkly. Makes me feel like I’m doing something. It’s also nice to use in collages. It allows you to layer with transparency. I usually make it more transparent by adding an oil.
I just did these collage sketches last night, adding to a sketch book from college actually. I realized recently as I was going through it mining for ideas (best reason to keep a book) that I still had space in it. I do this type of sketching when I’m going through an artistic transition of some kind and need to work through it.
The first is a tiny canvas about 2 inches x 2 inches the rest are in my book. All components are recycled.
Can We Be Allowed To Evolve...Please?
Kevin Hart was recently taken to task over comments and/or jokes he made on his Twitter feed in 2011. As a result he decided to step down as host of an awards show. Al Franken lost his job as a representative in part because of a picture he took in poor taste (and some other things, but that is where the outrage began) over 13 years ago. Both apologized. Believing their actions were funny and or acceptable at the time of their actions have since evolved into different people with different perspectives. Not that apologies solve every problem (it is a place to start at least), but neither does roasting someone over a fire…that’s a different chat we can have later though.
I directly relate these cultural conversations to how we as artists often experiment, try new subject matter and techniques that don’t always work out. Maybe you should have done more research? Maybe all of the work in that red, white, and purple phase you were going through should be burned? Maybe you shouldn’t have written ten songs about cheese and posted them on SoundCloud?
These individuals engaged in either activities or behavior that many years later doesn’t reflect on them in the best way. But I don’t feel it is my job as someone looking at their past actions to be their judge, nor is it really the right of any of us to judge them in the fickle court of public opinion; especially through the lens of social media which has shown itself to be inaccurate at best. I do think it is my job as a fellow human being and artist to ask: What have I done in my past that might not reflect well on the person I’ve evolved into today? How proud would I be of all the artwork I did in college? Would I be willing to pull it all out of boxes, portfolios, and closets for the world to see? Am I willing to stand behind all of the art choices I made in high school?
My point? We all make mistakes or simply have done things at various times in our lives that we wouldn’t think shows the best of who we are as people in our current manifestation. Can’t we have the opportunity to move beyond who we’ve been to become who we should be without being punished for the entirety of our life? I think so.
Don’t we evolve as humans and professionally? Shouldn’t others be given the opportunity to as well?
The Face of Art
Have you ever watched the show the Next Great Artist? It was, all at once, the most horrible, eye-opening, car crash of a television show. Though the show is no longer producing new episodes it still stands as testimony that some of us buy into the theory that art can be manufactured and packaged, and branded without it having a disastrous effect on the idea of art as a whole.
Could You Be Standing In Your Own Way Creatively?
What's Stopping your work from moving to the next level? Could it be you?